Men’s Dating Guide for Talking to a Woman on the First Date

One of the most difficult things that many men who have just gone through the breakup of a long-term relationship must do is carry on a conversation when they start dating again. It’s not the easiest thing in the world for men who have likely been taught for decades that women go for the strong silent type and have refined the fine art of not talking in order to satisfy this age old stereotype.

The modern woman wants a little something more from her man than women in the past and it’s time to adapt and adjust. It really doesn’t hurt as much as you might have been lead to believe to carry on a conversation with an attractive woman. Chances are that you do find her attractive if you’ve asked her out.

The first step in carrying on a great conversation is to find some common ground. Do you both like old science fiction movies? Are you both advocates for the environment? Find something you have in common and build conversations around the passions you share. If you both really love those things you should never run out of things to talk about.

The next step is to follow her cues. If she gives cryptic responses or short answers it might be a topic that she’s not interested in discussing (at least not at this point). If she expands on her answers and asks questions that invite you into the conversation you’ve got a winner.

It’s also important to be responsive to the questions she asks of you. Yes and no answers aren’t going to cut it when you’re out on a date. She’s trying to get to know you a little better and wants to see how your mind works and what makes you tick. Give her a little something to work with beyond yes or no.

There is a fine line between responsive and overly chatty. Besides you don’t want to become an open book on your first date. Just let her get a glimpse of the first chapter so she’ll be hungry for more in subsequent dates. If you give her the entire book on the first date there’s no reason for her to come back for more.

Finally, use conversation to build a sense of excitement about things to come. Drop hints about future dates (assuming you’re truly interested in another date) but reveal few actual details. Words are wonderful tools for setting a mood, delving into the heart and soul of another person, and creating a sense of excitement for things to come. Use them wisely and they will serve you well.

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